Never Wanna Say Bye
by Smithy44
Summary: Set after S4 Ep4. Can Naomi really prove to Emily that she loves her? Will Emily let Naomi's cheating go and try to forgive her?
1. It Ends Right Now

**I love love love Skins but im so annoyed with the way they are handling Naomily at the moment. So im writing my own fanfic, this starts off with The Fitch's living at Naomi's house. Please stick with it and leave comments, much appreciated!**

Only the sound of cutlery scraping plates could be heard. An uncomfortable silence filled the room and everyone looked down at their food. Rob decided to treat everyone to a Chinese takeaway, him being the only person to try and lighten everybody's mood. The atmosphere felt so tense that everyone was stuck stiff in their seats.

"This is nice, isn't it?" Jenna forced a smile and reached for her glass.

The Fitch family had been living with Naomi for nearly a week. Even though Rob was trying his hardest to sort out accommodation, Jenna couldn't help but feel anger towards him. He had got them into this mess, he had to get them out, no ifs or buts.

Katie sat back in her seat, she glanced over at her sister, the whole hating Naomi thing was starting to piss her off. Even though she always knew Naomi would do something like this, she wanted them to be okay, they both looked damn miserable.

"Yeah, are you two going to college tomorrow?" Katie asked trying to make light conversation with somebody, she hated awkward silences.

Emily looked up from her food and shrugged her shoulders, "Yeah gotta hand my coursework in" she replied, looking over at Naomi before continuing to eat.

"That's my girl, work hard and you'll get the grades you want, you too Naomi" Rob half smiled helping himself to more food. Things were getting better in his eyes and he knew his family could get through this tough time, the Fitch's being far from weak would soon have somewhere to live in no time.

Naomi put her fork down, she hadn't touched her food, the thought of eating it made her stomach churn. Pretending to be nice to Jenna and Katie for Emily's sake was starting to piss her off, even when they were being nice Naomi could see the falseness behind their eyes.

"Thanks, but im not really hungry" Naomi got up from her chair and walked into the kitchen. She lit a cigarette and lent against the worktops, her hope of Emily forgiving her was starting to fade. Their relationship had sunk to rock bottom, Naomi had no idea how to get them floating again, everything she said or did was simply not good enough.

The fumes from the cigarette stung her eyes, she knew she looked like complete shit. Dark black circles under her eyes, her lips were chapped and her hair was a disaster. Sleeping was a task and a hard one at that. Even when she allowed her mind to switch off and drift into a sleep she always dreamt of that day. The day when Emily found out the truth, the day when she no longer looked at her the same. Most of her days were spent smoking dope or getting pissed, neither one particularly helping her in any shape or form.

"What's the matter?" Emily asked walking into the kitchen, she shut the door whilst her family began falling into conversation. Although she knew Naomi had suffered enough she couldn't help but be cold towards her, every time her heart told her to stop and forgive her her head would tell her no.

Naomi flicked the ash into the sink and shook her head. "Nothing every thing is fine" she replied, she swallowed the thick lump in her throat before taking another toke. How could she possibly tell Emily how much she was hurting when she was the one who had caused all of this.

Emily tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and studied the blonde, she was sure she hadn't seen Naomi look this shitty ever. "Mum and Katie are trying to be nice, trying to make the effort to talk to you" the redhead explained getting up and opening a window.

"They hate me Em, you all do" Naomi stated running the fag under the tap.

Emily frowned, "I don't hate you, do you want me to hate you?" she asked ignoring the tears building in her eyes. Ever since she found out the tears kept her company every night, even when she tried to think of something other then Naomi cheating.

"No" Naomi said quietly folding her arms and staring at the floor. Her arms ached to hold Emily, she longed to feel the warmth in her stomach when they touched. "Its fine I'll make the effort" Naomi half shrugged and half smiled.

"Don't do that" Emily said, her voice strained from lack of moisture. "Don't fucking try and make me feel bad" she continued not taking her eyes off the tall blonde in front of her.

Naomi rubbed her forehead, "We've been through all this Ems, what do you want me to do?" she asked flinging her arms to the sides. Tears rolled down her cheeks, she hated feeling so exposed and vulnerable. "Because I don't know what to do or what to say Emily, im sorry, im so fucking sorry how many times do you want me to say it?" she sobbed trying to catch her breath.

"I don't" Emily sneered lowering her eyes, she hated to see Naomi crying.

Naomi wiped her nose with the sleeve of her hoodie, she could hear her heart drumming in her ears. "I want us to try just, just try again" she admitted taking a chance.

Emily bit her lip hard, of course being together was never easy. There was doubt there from day one and Naomi certainly pushed her away several times, but the redhead knew Naomi needed her, she needed someone to love her.

Emily's bottom lip wobbled, they had to move on together or be apart, it had come down to making a now or never choice. "I'm scared Naoms" she squeaked, "I'm really fucking scared" thick salty tears streamed down her face, she didn't want to live like this any more.

Naomi bravely took a step forward and wrapped her shaky arms around the redhead, she sighed with relief as Emily relaxed in her hold, she felt the smaller girls hand wrap around her back. They held each other tighter as they both let out a few more cries, things could only get better now.

"Naoms" Emily sniffed slowly breaking the contact between them.

"Yeah?" Naomi answered, she reached out and wiped away the tears from the redhead's perfect face.

Emily took a breath and looked Naomi in the eyes, even though she had hurt her so very badly, her sparkling blue eyes always held the truth. Naomi did love her, it was clear to see. "You have to be honest with me, you cant just run away from everything" she explained. "And even though im still hurting, I know I want this to work out" Emily swallowed the lump in her throat and watched as the blonde took her hand and locked their fingers together.

"I wont, I wont run away Em I promise" Naomi squeezed Emily's hand, they both exchanged a small smile before wrapping their arms around each other.

After several I love you's and promises of never hurting each other, the pair were startled by a knock on the door.

"Is it safe to come in? No smashing of plates or anything yeah?" Katie called from behind the door.

Naomi instantly rolled her eyes,"I think you would have heard, you can come in" she called back, she turned towards the kettle and filled it with water.

"Dad spoke to a mate of his, we can definitely move into the caravan for a while" Katie announced, embarrassment tinged her voice, she looked down at her hands and began chipping away at her nail polish.

Emily walked towards her twin and pulled her in for a hug, "I'm gonna stay here" she answered, although she felt guilty she knew she had to stay and work it out with Naomi. "It wont be for long, dad will get the house back" the redhead assured rubbing her back.

Katie shrugged her shoulders, "Yeah well its gotta be better then sharing a house with lezza's" she teased glancing at Naomi.

"I'll miss you Katiekins" Naomi replied spooning coffee into a mug.

Katie couldn't help but smile, if anyone knew how to really wind her up it was Naomi. Even though she hated her for putting Emily through so much pain, she knew the blonde was the only person in the world her sister wanted.

"Yeah well thanks for letting us stay, I don't know what we would have done to be honest" Katie admitted shuffling on the spot, she realised her teeth were grinding together when being nice to Naomi.

Emily raised her eyebrows, it was rather amusing watching her twin and girlfriend try to get along, atleast they weren't tearing shreds out of each other.

"This doesn't mean im being nice to you every time I see you, I still think your a bitch" Katie grinned crossing her arms.

Naomi turned and smiled, "Good then fuck off out of our house".

Katie hugged her sister one last time and walked out the door, she felt okay leaving her sister with Naomi, she knew they would pull through and work it out.

Emily accepted the cup of coffee from Naomi and took a sip, they didn't have to say anything, she didn't want to hear how Naomi would do anything for her and never hurt her again. Day by day they needed to work at it, Naomi would have to make the effort.


	2. Reaching For Help

**Thanks so much for the reviews, im so glad people like this! Please please if your reading drop me a comment, it spurs me on to write quicker which means quicker updates for you guys! Enjoy :)**

After The Fitch's gathered their belongings to move into the temporary caravan, Emily and Naomi were once again left alone in each others company. They both felt a weight lift off their shoulders after their chat in the kitchen, they knew things weren't going to slip back to normal, but they both decided to take a massive step in the right direction.

The next morning looked and felt alot clearer. Waking up in her own bed and finding Emily sleeping soundly next to her filled Naomi with contentment and relief. She couldn't remember the last time she slept in the same room as the redhead let alone sharing sheets.

Emily had done nothing but rush around trying to print off last minute coursework from Naomi's laptop, if she didn't hand it in first thing she knew she would be in the shit. The redhead felt pleased that her family were trying to get back on track, she felt even more pleased that they had moved out so her and Naomi could finally have some space. Emily gathered up her books she needed for the day and slipped her jacket on, she took a sharp intake of breath and reminded herself things were to only get better, even if it still hurt like fuck.

"Your going now? I'm not ready yet" Naomi ruffled her wet hair with a towel and stomped down the stairs.

Emily threw her bag over her shoulder, she tried her hardest not to let her eyes imagine the blonde's body under the towel, it had been a while since they had been intimate. "Yeah this coursework is just hanging over my head I wanna get rid of it, I said I would meet Katie, apparently she wants to talk" she shrugged opening the front door.

Naomi felt a pang of disappointment that they went walking into college together, she wanted everyone to see that no matter what had happened, the two were as strong as steel. "Oh, well yeah I'll just be there when im done" she smiled.

Emily gave a small nod and cleared her throat, things still felt very awkward between them. "Well, see you later" she mumbled glancing up and meeting Naomi's sparkling blue eyes.

Even though they had finally sorted things out, Naomi had no idea how to act around the redhead. There was a time when she could just touch or kiss Emily whenever she wanted, things were different now, it had changed. Naomi watched her girlfriend close the front door behind her, she let out a shaky breath and made her way back upstairs. The guilt and betrayal once again washed over her causing her little bubble of everything now being okay to pop. Naomi had to keep telling herself this would go away eventually, her and Emily were healing, together.

After getting dressed and drying her hair, Naomi realised she had a fair amount of time before her first class started. She walked over to her window and drew back the curtains, her garden looked a state from the eventful barbecue, the paddling pool now had bits of twig and leaf floating around in it. The trees swayed in the light wind, even though the sun was shining the air felt crisp as it rushed through the blonde's bedroom.

The sudden urge for a cigarette struck her and she rummaged through her bag to find her packet and lighter, she made a mental note that she really must give up because her clothes always stank like an ashtray. "Fucksake" she sighed realizing her packet was empty, typical really. Naomi gazed around her room, Emily had neatly made the bed before leaving, something the blonde could never really be bothered to do, infact it was always Emily that was tidying up and putting things away. Their summer of just being together felt so far away, like it happened a life time ago, now to look back on it felt depressing. All the lies had ripped their relationship to pieces, everything Emily believed in Naomi had shattered, she hated herself for it.

Naomi sat on the edge of the bed and took the picture frame from the bedside table. The blonde couldn't help but smile, the way Emily was looking at her like she was the only person in the world, it made the hairs on her arms stand. She traced her finger round the redheads perfect face, she never thought she could hurt another human being so badly, she destroyed Emily completely. The tears began swimming in her eyes, she couldn't cry about it any more, she had to be the strong one, make it all better. Naomi placed the picture back and carefully wiped the stray tears, she ignored the heavy feeling straining her chest, she didn't want to look like shit from crying.

The blonde grabbed her bag and keys, time began ticking on and the last thing she needed was a bollocking from Doug for being late. Naomi walked into the kitchen and grabbed her coat from the back of the chair, she slipped it on and untucked her hair from the back. Naomi's brain suddenly sprung into life, Gina always kept a packet of cigarettes in the top cupboard, they were probably old and hadn't been touched for ages but she needed a nicotine fix. She opened the cupboard and smiled at her sheer brilliance of remembering, she tossed the packet in her bag and reached to shut it. Naomi frowned at the stuffed papers behind the chipped coffee mugs, she moved the cups to one side and took out the crumpled and slightly ripped holiday brochures.

A wave of sickness hit Naomi, she knew Emily wanted to go travelling, but at the time of them talking about it the blonde only agreed because they were both swooped up in love. Naomi had no idea the redhead was being serious, people say things all the time when they are caught up in lust filled moments of passion. The whole time Emily had been serious about the two setting off together and exploring the world, meanwhile Naomi was busy being unfaithful. The tears were unstoppable as she flicked through them. Mexico,Cyprus,Ibiza. Naomi tried her best to straighten out the leaflets, she carefully placed them on the kitchen table where they could be seen. Wherever Emily wanted to go she would follow. Because she loved her, more then anyone.

* * *

Once Emily handed her coursework in she stood by her locker waiting for her sister. She felt bad for leaving Naomi this morning but she needed the fresh air, things were moving and changing so fast that she needed some time to step back. Emily looked around as people walked past her, she wondered if things would ever go back to how they used to be. After hearing Effy's attempt to kill herself, she decided to put things into perspective. Naomi had done something terrible and the feeling of wanting to break down and sob every time she looked at her was not going to fade fast. But Emily knew in time she could forgive her, the feeling of being in love felt far greater then sinking into depression without Naomi there.

"Before you ask the caravan sucks, its so fucking tiny I cant fit all of my clothes in the wardrobe" Katie moaned opening her locker and throwing a few books in.

Emily quickly snapped out of her thoughts and turned to her twin, the two were so different to when they were kids, they were no longer a double package any more, just separate people. "Yeah well its not forever, dad will sort something out" Emily assured leaning against the lockers.

Katie rolled her eyes, she was sick of hearing everything was going to be sorted, all talk and no action. "What's wrong with you? You look all..i dunno weirded out or something" the twin frowned slamming her locker shut causing Emily to jump.

"I'm fine just tired. Didn't you wanna talk to me?" Emily asked, hoping Katie wouldn't ask how she and Naomi were doing, she wanted the spotlight well and truly off her and her relationship.

Katie licked her lips and sighed, "It doesn't matter any more" she said softly shifting on the spot. She knew hiding a secret from her twin was impossible, they had shared a room since they were born, the knew practically everything about each other.

"If it doesn't matter why are you nearly crying?" Emily asked, her face hardened with concern.

Katie grabbed hold of her twins hand and led her towards the toilets, this was not something she could just blurt out in a corridor full of people. Once checking all the cubicles were empty, Katie stood against the hand dryer and tried not to get upset by her bad news.

"Katie your scaring me, what is it? Is it mum?" Emily asked trying to figure out what the hell was going on, living away from home had its disadvantages, she had no idea what was happening in the Fitch household.

Katie shook her head, "No its not mum, its about me" she spluttered wiping a tear away before it ruined her mascara. "I went to the doctors like a week ago and they told me I could never have kids" Katie struggled holding a hand over her mouth as the last sentence left her lips. Knowing in the future she could never have a baby had changed all her plans, motherhood was something she was never going to experience, ever.

Emily felt her heart sink, she had been so wrapped up in her own problems she had no idea what her sister was going through. She should have been the one to go with her, hold her hand when receiving the terrible news, she felt her eyes sting with hot tears. Emily walked towards Katie and wrapped her arms around her, she felt her sister bury her head in her neck as the sobs echoed around the toilets.

* * *

"Naomikins,how's my favourite muff muncher?" Cook asked jumping off the steps in delight.

Naomi was already late, she told herself not to be persuaded to bunk off because Cook was bored and had fuck all to do. "What happened to prison?" she asked approaching the college.

Cook shrugged his shoulders and lit a spliff, "You know me, can't stay in one place for long,get bored" he grinned inhaling deeply. "Hows you and Emily?" he asked shoving a hand in his pocket.

Naomi noticed his dirty polo top, she felt sorry for him, he had nobody to call on. "We're getting there, taking each day as it comes and all that" she replied biting her bottom lip, she was eager to get to her lesson simply because she didn't want Emily to be suspicious.

"I was wondering yeah" Cook began. "If I could just kip at yours for a few days you know? It wont be for long just.. till I get myself sorted" he asked taking another toke, his voice held vulnerability, asking for help always made him feel weak.

Naomi cocked her head to the side, "Its just, me and Emily were finally starting to make a go of things" she explained slouching her shoulders, she hated letting her friend down, especially when he needed her. "I've gotta do what's best for her you know? I wish I could help.."

"Nah its cool man its cool" Cook cut her off quickly and flashed a false grin. There was always Uncle Keith if his situation got desperate.

"Feel free to take a shower and make something to eat though, there's a spare key under the plant pot on the right" Naomi smiled and made her way up the steps, she turned to her friend.

Cook exchanged a smile of thanks along with a nod, "Cheers" he answered putting out the spliff with his foot before walking away.

Naomi watched as he walked off into the distance, sometimes the strongest person in the world needs a helping hand, no matter how much they deny that being on their own doesn't suck. In a way Naomi knew she and Cook were alike, they both made fucked up choices not thinking about the consequences, they both needed someone. Naomi's someone was Emily, without a doubt.


	3. Another Barrier Broken

**This is a filler chapter really, just to get Naomily to re-connect. Got a lot of exciting stuff on the way so please stick with this and review!**

**The finale looks really good,lets just hope we get what we want :D**

After an emotional chat with her twin, Emily promised she wouldn't distance herself from her family. As much as they pissed her off she did love them dearly, she sometimes even missed James and his pervy remarks.

The rest of college flew by quickly, Emily felt her stomach knot at the thought of seeing Naomi, they hadn't seen each other since the morning and things were still stiff. Emily walked out of the building letting the cool air wake her up, she let her mind over think what's to happen next. Of course she wanted Naomi to try and make it right, she wanted the doubt to vanish so she didn't have to feel it. It had been difficult to say the least, watching the person your in love with fall off the incredibly high pedestal you placed them on. Naomi fell hard.

Naomi had text Emily a few hours ago, telling her that all her classes had finished, she had gone home to finish some over due coursework. As honest as the message was, the redhead couldn't help but sit and wonder if she was really telling the truth, the lies had damaged every ounce of trust Emily had. She knew she had to start trusting Naomi otherwise their bruised relationship was never going to fix and heal.

Walking up to the front door, she rummaged through her bag and pulled out her keys, she felt relieved when she shut the door behind herself and felt the warm air from the heating. The redhead dumped her bag down and made her way into the kitchen. Breadcrumbs were scattered across the kitchen worktops, a family sized bottle of coke had been drunk and the biscuit cupboard had been left wide open. Emily frowned wondering what the hell was going on.

"Em is that you?" Naomi called from the bedroom.

Emily made her way to the stairs, "Yeah" she replied deciding to climb the stairs and ask who had been invading their kitchen. "What's going on?" she asked reaching the top stair and walking into their bedroom.

"What do you mean?" Naomi asked neck deep in coursework. The essay had been pissing her off for nearly two hours, she knew she had to get it done.

Emily sat on the end of the bed, "What happened to the kitchen? Its a fucking mess" she studied the blonde closely looking for any slip ups or panic reactions. She hated it had come down to thinking her girlfriend was lying, but she couldn't help it, it wasn't her fault her mind had been set like that.

Naomi looked up from her work, "Oh the convict was here, I said he could have a shower and make some food" she smiled softly tapping the pen on her knee.

Emily ignored the joke and walked to the window, it was hard to keep her emotions under control when all she wanted to do was cry and be angry. "Why was he here though?" she moaned.

"Because he had no where else to go and quite frankly he stunk, its the least I could do Em" Naomi explained wondering why Cook showering in her house was such a big deal.

Emily nodded, she had no energy to argue, she felt so drained from the last few weeks it was a surprise she could be bothered to breathe. "You've been doing coursework all this time?" she asked walking back over to the blonde and taking her handwritten notes. "You haven't got very far" she raised an eyebrow.

Naomi let out a sigh, "Yeah well I been busy thinking. I found them holiday leaflets this morning" she gathered her papers together and shoved them in a plastic file. "I think maybe we should talk about it?" she asked carefully praying that Emily wouldn't kick off.

"There's nothing to say, we're not going any more so what does it matter?" Emily replied simply shrugging her shoulders.

"Why?"

"Because you never wanted to go Naomi, you just said you would to shut me up"

"It wasn't like that"

"It was exactly like that"

Naomi looked down at her hands, was there anything she could say to make Emily believe her? She wasn't so sure. She knew them getting back on track was going to take alot of time, Naomi knew it wasn't going to happen over night. The blonde felt the tears threatening to fall from her eyes, it felt so strange to feel so miserable all the time, espically when being around Emily. "I'm trying Em" she whispered, her bottom lip quivered.

Emily sighed heavily and looked at her girlfriend, she looked so broken and lost, and even though she had done wrong she was beginning to feel sorry for her. "I know" she reached out placing her hand ontop of the blonde's. "I know" she repeated again.

Their eyes connected and the love they always felt for each other washed over the pair of them, an overwhelming feeling of unconditional love, it was almost too much to bare. With Emily being so angry at her and giving her the silent treatment, she had alot of time to figure out how she really felt about the redhead. The love had always been there, Naomi just refused to acknowledge it. Emily locked their fingers together, their hands fitting so perfectly just like always.

"I love you" Emily said bravely, her voice cracking with raw emotion.

Naomi let out a sob, it had been ages since she heard them three words leave Emily's lips. "I love you too, so much. So much" she cried sucking in a deep breath, she wanted the redhead to realize she was no longer afraid to show her emotions, everything had to be out in the open.

Leaning in so their foreheads were touching they both let out a shaky nervous breath, it felt like they were touching each other for the very first time, like they barely knew one another but still felt so much love and passion.

Emily knew Naomi had no idea where they stood, everything was now down to her, to make the first move and decide how slow or fast the relationship was to move. The redhead's lips brushed against the blonde's, they both shut their eyes wanting to feel and cherish each moment. Emily moved her hand to Naomi's cheek and kissed her softly, she felt her stomach flip-flop as her heart slowly took off.

Naomi kissed her back, it was the most tender kisses she had ever had, so soft that she barely felt their lips touch. The blonde's heart was racing so fast she could hear it drumming away in her ears, everything felt like slow-motion to capture each part, not missing one detail.

Emily moved into Naomi's arms, she inhaled the smell of fresh lavender, and closed her eyes tightly. She felt strong arms snake around her back along with a content sigh from the blonde.

"We're gonna be okay" Naomi whispered hugging Emily as tight as she possibly could.

"I know" Emily replied simply, she believed in them, she knew they would be together.

**Please review if you can.**


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